Awesome Weekend

This past weekend we made no plans, and it was absolutely fantastic.

We had gone to the home and garden show the weekend before and I had entered my name in a few draws so on Tuesday I got a call that I had won a family photo session. Unfortunately all my family is 3000 km away so I asked if I could bring my boyfriend and dogs instead so we changed it to a couple session for Friday night. We had a lot of fun. We couldn't see the pictures until Saturday afternoon though. So Nice Guy slept over on Friday night and we just hung out and caught up on PVR tv shows that we had missed.

Saturday morning we woke up and went to pick up baby ducks! They are so cute! Nice Guy got me two runner ducks that I named after my sisters and he got 6 Cayuga ducks. They are going to live at his farm. Ducks are the happiest farm animal. I didn't take any pictures though, so I'll have to do that and post them next time. After we brought them back to the farm and set them up with their heat lamp, food and water, we came back into town and stopped by the pet store that was hosting adoptable dogs. We have two now but I had seen their pictures online and they looked so sweet. Nice Guy is encouraging me to adopt one but I don't think that's the most responsible thing to do at the minute since I'm travelling a lot for work and would require someone to take care of it and my regular dog for me. They were nice dogs though...

Then we ate at YoYo's, where I got a strawberry banana nutella crepe and my stomach experienced euphoria. It was so delicious I nearly cried. When I dream of food this will be on a pedestal. I took a photo when it was half eaten so it probably doesn't look as good as it actually was. But just trust me on this one....

Finally we get to see the pictures! There was a picture of us doing leap frog that I liked the idea for but needed a better expression on my face. We tried to do a photo of me flipping up on his back but I look scared and I was wearing jeans and although my legs look long, the pants just made them look funny. There was a few with me on piggy back too. But I liked the photos with the dogs in them the best. I ended up getting this long photo that has us lying on our stomachs and the dogs on either side, we all look very happy. It's not a normal photo though, they custom frame and put some sort of protectant on it and stuff so I can't actually pick it up for 6 weeks. They also didn't let me how much it would cost before we did the shoot, but at least the photography session was free. Plus I think it'll look really good on my wall.

Then we picked up the dogs and some clothes for me and drove out to see a house/acreage (the one we fought about on Wednesday). It ended up being way too far and the land was flooded on a dry year so neither one of us liked it. So we went back to his place and I did some painting and he worked on a shed and then we built a campfire and had hotdogs and potatoes. It was an awesome night, nice and warm and no bugs!

Sunday we went to church and saw his family but we came back in the early afternoon because I wanted to keep working on the painting I was making for his brother. And I got it done! I don't think I'm totally happy with the head, I may go back and make it a little darker. I decided to leave it for a few days and come back and see if I was honestly happy with it. If not I'll make some changes and then wait again. When I am content with it I'll spray it with some protector stuff and then give it to him.

Overall I had an awesome weekend. It was so nice not to have to be committed to do anything. I should try to do this more often. 

I just wanted to sleep

So we got into a fight on Wednesday night... and it's partly my fault but it's also a lot of his fault.

First, let's just set some background information; I like my sleep. I've always liked my sleep. I don't function well on little sleep. When I was young and the news would come on and say "it's 11 o'clock, do you know where your children are?" my mom would confidently say "they are in bed." And every time she would be right. All through highschool, all through university I was getting solid sleep. I have never pulled an "All-Nighter". Ever. Not once. So now that we've established that I really need my beauty sleep, I'll continue with the fight.

So on Wednesday we had fooled around and then I was done. He had slept over the night before so I wasn't expecting him to stay, but he lingered. And he likes to talk, so I was lying there and letting him talk, although what I really wanted to do was shut off the lights and go to sleep. But then I start getting grumpy, because we'd been spending a lot of time together lately, and he likes to talk in bed, at bedtime.... And I've been tracking my sleep patterns on my iPhone with Sleep Cycle and I'm used to getting 8 or 9 hours of sleep and for the past month I've been averaging 7 and a half... Just saying....

So apparently I brought up looking at houses, although he's the one that printed off the descriptions and left them on my coffee table accidentally, and he wanted to know when a good time was and which houses we should look at. And there was one North of the city, that's almost as far North as he is West right now, but it would be good because it's closer to his parents and the church and stuff. And at some point I just got tired of the talking and said I don't care, I just think it's really far.

I have forgotten what happened during this next part but I do remember him asking if I wanted to live together before or after we got engaged and I said "When I'm ready", which he didn't like... But I have no control over when exactly he's going to ask me, so how can I know if I'll want to live together by then? And I was tired and grumpy and I don't think well under those conditions so I probably said some stuff that was a bit insensitive.

After a few more minutes of him talking to me about houses I broke down crying and yelled "You never let me sleep! I just want to sleep" and he questioned why I didn't want to look at houses or move in together and I told him "That's just how I feel. At this very second I am just nervous about that step. It's just how I'm feeling at this moment. I'm just not comfortable with it. But I'm tired and I might feel completely different tomorrow once I'm more like myself". But he didn't really like that answer and was questioning how I felt about him and us and are we moving too fast and I just started crying again.

Then he said "What can I do to make it better?" and I told him "You can leave."

Which I think really hurt his feelings but at that point I didn't care. I just wanted to sleep, that's all. I didn't want to fight, I didn't have the energy, I wasn't getting my point across anyway. I needed sleep.

So he left and I slept great. And I woke up the next morning all happy. I sent him a text message which he didn't respond to so I sent him another asking if he was mad at me. And he responded that he wasn't mad, he was just frustrated. So I said we could talk after work.

And we did. I explained that I seriously need my sleep, and I just don't function well without it. And he said "Ya I can see that". So at least we're on the same page with that now. And I told him I feel better about looking at houses, just to see how far away they are and if I'd be willing to make the drive. And once we know how far is too far we'll have a range for when we're really ready to look. I'm much more reasonable when I'm awake and rested. And I explained the "I don't know exactly when you're going to ask me so how will I know if I'll be ready to move in before or after?" thing, which I had done a terrible job of the night before. So now we're going to try not to bring up things that may be bothering us right before bedtime.

So we fought. And we made it through to the other side. I'm really glad he told me he was frustrated with me and just didn't wimp out and say nothing was bothering him. And I'm glad he didn't guilt trip me about anything I had done that night, I know I hurt his feelings but I wasn't trying to, I just wanted sleep.

Something that really annoyed me about the Ex was that whenever we fought, he would say "You're right. I'm a terrible boyfriend. I don't know why you're with me". And I would be manipulated into saying "You're not that bad. I may be over-reacting a little. You really are good to me". And some how, whenever he did something wrong that seriously pissed me off, I'd end up consoling him about it. It drove me insane. So one of my big hang ups with Nice Guy was that we had never really fought yet, and I really didn't want to be with someone who fought the same way as the Ex.

I feel really good about this guy...